Friday, 19 June 2009
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Life has been pretty overwhelming lately. My back has been giving out again so I've started acupuncture once a wk & went back to the chiropractor X3/wk. I'm thankful that at least I finally sold my house. But now I've been busy hunting for a house. I feel stressed out b/c of the time factor. It's quite a different experience trying to make decisions on my own. I spent the past 8 yrs sharing the decision making process w/a life partner. And suddenly, now I'm on my own. Buying a house isn't like buying a pair of shoes. I wish it was that simple. It's been a difficult process for me, but I'm learning alot through it. I have a tendency to want to uncover every single rock b/4 I make a decision. I suppose I'm afraid I might make the wrong choice. And I'm trying to find that perfect house with the perfect price in the perfect location for the perfect scenario. Well I'm learning that it's not happening that way. I'm thankful for the guidance I've been getting from friends & family. But I know in the end, I have to trust that God will lead me. And I can't follow where God is leading if I'm gripped w/fear all the time. I miss talking things out with YM & making choices together. Once in awhile I'll ask the boys what they think of the house we're looking at. One time Joel said, "I liked the cactus plant," and Nathan said, "I liked the zebra rug......can we buy that house?" Life is so much simpler when you're a kid.
Please pray that I will learn to trust God & listen to his voice through this process. I know that's where I'll find my ultimate peace. Please also pray that God will heal my back. It can be pretty debilitating while I'm trying to care for the kids. Thank you for listening & caring.
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